Till Unmasking Do Us Part

Not the actual wedding party.

                For the two of you who breathlessly await one of these, I apologize.  I was at my son’s wedding in Blacksburg, Virginia this weekend.  Perhaps not surprisingly, a movement is afoot in that small western Virginia town to rename it “Burg of Color.”  Since the college, Virginia Tech, is out for the summer, I think the effort will fail due to an overwhelming amount of brain cells.

                NOTE #1:  I’m kidding, but seriously, would it surprise you?

                NOTE #2:  Incidentally, if you are breathlessly awaiting one of these, might I suggest intensive psychiatric help?

                In any event, it’s been more than three weeks since I wrote anything besides personal checks.  Things have been busy, and I now find myself at my son’s and new daughter-in-law’s house in Richmond, watching their dog.  Who has a remarkable ability of licking himself.  Sigh…if only…

                Anyway, the wedding was a blast.  Happily, nobody got injured or arrested.  This all despite the fact there was an open bar.  There were more than a few hangovers the next morning, I’m sure.  Not me, you understand.  As father of the groom, I held myself to a high standard of gravitas and dignity.

                This was not the case the evening before at the “Welcome Party” held at a local brewery, mind you.  Somewhere that evening, I lost the power of speech.  And my pants.  So there’s that.

                So, what’s the point of this entire screed, you might be asking?  That is, if you’re still with us.

                My point is that I didn’t see a mask the entire wedding.  Okay, sure, the Governor of Virginia, Ralph Northam (He of the Blackface), rescinded the Commonwealth-wide mask decree the Friday before.  A lot of private businesses are still allowed to require patrons to don the face diaper, though (by the way, I have zero problem with this.  If a private entity wants to go this route, do).

                The only time I saw a proliferation of masks was at our hotel.  That was cool with me, even though quite a few times I just didn’t wear one (same went for a lot of guests).  I kept it with me just in case an employee asked me to throw it on.  No way would I give them any grief about it.  None did.

Wrong mask

                The existence of vaccines has resulted in this shift.  I’d go for the reemergence of common sense, but okay, whatever.  I’m just thrilled to be able to walk around without a piece of cloth hiding my face.  Although, it was nice being able to hide my cold sores and not have to shave on a regular basis.  Still, I’m happy.

                The skeptical among us wonder whether this has anything to do with the Idiot-in-Chief’s botching of just about everything besides eating ice cream and sniffing little girls.  Removing mask directives could be a way to distract people away from the seemingly countless disasters coming from Washington.  Maybe, maybe not.

                Establishments have posted notices that if you have been vaccinated, a mask is not mandatory.  Of course, this requires all people to be honest about their medical status.  Personally, I think that’s placing a whole lot of faith in humanity.  If you doubt that, how many people do you actually think pay attention to “55 MPH” signs?

“I do. Especially on sidewalks. Oops. Pooped myself.”

                To ensure compliance would involve asking folks to produce proof of their vaccinated status.   HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA…yeah, good luck with that.  So we’re clear, if ANYone asks whether I got the shot or not (hasn’t happened yet), I’m prepared to answer “Nunya.”

                NOTE #3:  For those who do not know-“None Ya Bidness.”

                I hope to see an increasing number of bare faces in the coming weeks.  I honestly feel that the more people ditch the diaper, the more other people will feel comfortable with ditching the diaper.  Just like before it was mandatory, when people put on masks just to fit in with the crowd, so it will go in the opposite direction.   Although, if I see “mask not required” at the store entrance I have no trouble sticking that nonsense in my pocket.  I’ll admit, though, that some folks may be hesitant to do the same.  That said, I maintain that the more people’s faces you see, the more comfortable you will be joining them.

                Disturbingly, I’m seeing the response to this entire episode becoming political.  My goodness, why?  Is common sense, logic, and critical thought dependent on whether you’re a donkey or an elephant?  For some, it apparently is.

                Likewise with the fact that the states leading the way are largely governed by Republicans, despite being accused of “Neanderthalism” (I made that word up.  Feel free to use it).  Even though places like Florida and Texas have lower reported cases of COVID-19 while eschewing the mask than the sideshows of, say, New York or California, the Left beats the drum that Red States are irresponsible.

                For pity’s sake, numbers don’t lie.  What’s more, the same people who bleated “follow the science” (we won’t get into the fact that science isn’t infallible all the time here.  I’m talking to you, Al Gore) aren’t following the science now since it doesn’t fit in with their narrative.

                Incidentally, what’s even more disturbing?  I wonder how many people wouldn’t be leery about getting the vaccine had Donald Trump been reelected (I won’t get into whether that’s true or not here, either).  Call me cynical, but I wouldn’t be surprised if the Republican Party would then be leading the charge into shot clinics.

                After all, it was his administration which aggressively green-lit the things in the first place.

                To be seen as a mask-wearer is to be seen as a Republican “Anti-Vaxxer.”  I really wonder what the case would be if the shoe was on the other foot.  Like I said, call me cynical, but I ‘ll bet that many in the Democratic Party would be bitching about the vaccine.

                In other other words, if Ron DeSantis thinks the sun rises in the east, Nancy Pelosi would demand a special commission to determine if it’s so.

                Oh, and if you’re wondering whether I got vaccinated or not?  Nunya.

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